Delayed Flight # 6

I proceed with caution as I stand in-line and wait to use the ATM machine, or search for an empty sanitized booth to gobble down that conspicuous protein of processed meat in my Quarter Pounder with Cheese.
My fear lingers like a stuffy nose, an illness of self-doubt hoping to make it past my next birthday as I read about others just like myself who depend on the awareness of local reporters to fill me in when I should be suspicious of certain elements on my next flight, or very cautious of hotel bed comforters.
I wish my frightened inner child would disappear, fade away into my subconscious and realize that I have nothing to be afraid of, that everything will be ok. But eventually I wake up.
Hot flashes and a cold sweat.
Chills of discomfort and blood shot eyes.
The television turns on and it proves that indeed I should be fearful for my life, to not play with toys made from china, to not consume the green leaf goodness of a balanced diet if the packaged pesticides have defected lot numbers.
We were told to live life to the fullest, to not be afraid of anything and take chances. But used car salesmen are all liars as they fill my head with diagnostic concerns for my car, how if I do not get it fixed now, I might not live to tell about my mistake on a car insurance commercial.
When does it all end? When will there be a time when I can relax without malice?
The headlines say cell phones cause brain tumors.
The president states they want to take away my freedom.
Paranoia is a justified feeling that controls me, that will always hover over my head the way a dark shadow can remain peering over my shoulder at a coffee shop as I hesitantly type away on my laptop.
There was a time long ago when fear was brought by a great power to create order in a world of chaos. When a powerful being exposed the “truth” about his own conception by testifying to his people that he was a descendent of a high power, that if his people did not do what he said, they would all suffer, burn for eternity in a fiery grave that will never perish.
Now that same equation of control is still being used today, to instill the same terror to the masses, realizing nothing in life is for free, not even your own will.
When did fiction turn to fact?
When did man’s fables become truth?
Living life to the fullest and without fear is a delicate flower in the Amazon that hasn’t been touched by human hands, which means my freedom has become a self-made prison of erratic compulsion that can no longer cope with the outside world unless I’m wrapped in cellophane wearing a bullet proof vest just to get the mail.